Thursday, November 28, 2019

Thanksgiving Dinner: Please Pass the Turkey and Hold the Guilt


The Weight Watcher Newbie Holiday Trilogy: Part I


So here it is…my first Weight Watchers (WW) Thanksgiving. After ten weeks and 20 pounds, I find myself facing today’s culinary exploits with a mixture of anticipatory salivation and anxiety-induced stomach acid. Mostly the former.

Since my weekly workshops are on Thursdays, I played the part of the good caloric soldier and made it a point to take in a workshop yesterday. Despite the warm welcome, I still felt like something of a oddity: a young(ish?) appearing middle-aged man who by all outward appearances didn’t seem to have too much excess weight to shed, thanks in part to my excess body fat having the good grace to distribute itself relatively evenly about my body rather than sit like a basketball above my belt. But the offending blubber is there in vast quantities, I assure you. The bathroom mirror doesn’t lie, tactless bitch-goddess that it is.

The main topic of conversation focused on coming up with strategies to deal with and get past what just about everyone in the room felt was going to be an “off”, “blown”, “ruined” or “cheat” day. A vibe of premature guilt, apprehension and self-doubt hung heavy in the air like the smell of weed at a Grateful Dead show. Why, I wondered, was everyone treating something as wonderful as Thanksgiving like some sort of obstacle to be overcome rather than a day to be celebrated to the fullest and savored figuratively if not literally?

So during a lull in the conversation I spoke up and offered my two cents on the matter, the same two cents you’re reading (or have long since stopped reading) right now.

WW is a way of life, not a diet. A marathon rather than a sprint, the finish line being not only a slimmer me but a healthier one as well based on a sane, realistic and sustainable relationship with food. 

The beauty of the program and the key to its success and staying power is that it’s based on moderation, not deprivation. Nothing is off limits, nor are you expected to limit your choices to only a potion of the food pyramid. It's based on sound science and common sense rather than pseudo-science, fad, whim or whatever crazy-ass shit you saw on Facebook last week.

Were I to plot my 5'7" body's journey from 200 pounds to my goal of 150 pounds I would right now be approaching the half-way point. The line would have a decided downward slant but between the two ends would appear a fair share of peaks: times when my weight went up rather than down.

The first time I was faced with a weight gain at weigh-in I was disgusted. I felt like a failure, focusing on the .8 pound gain and forgetting all about the many pounds I’d shed up to that point. We as a society often tend to focus more readily on the negative than the positive and as a member of said society I’m no different.

However, over the past few weeks I've had an epiphany of sorts. The up weeks are indeed failures but only if narrowly defined as exceeding a predetermined allotment of Points. But that's not all they are. Up weeks, down weeks and no-change-weeks are all part of a much larger, much more important whole. They're all part of...what's the word I'm looking for? Oh yeah, LIFE.

Ask any of the WW Powers That Be and I’d bet my last bowl of Turkey Hill's Double Dunker ice cream* that they’d tell you that WW was actually designed with up weeks in mind. They’re not exceptions to the plan, they’re an integral part of it. 

Given the plan's success rate over the years I'm going to guess that the folks at WW aren't stupid. They know that to design a plan that didn’t acknowledge the reality that weight loss and maintenance always includes upticks on the scale would make about as much sense as the lyrics to Van Halen’s Jump.

This sort of life-long timeline virtually guarantees that there will invariably be times when we put on a few pounds, times when we leave our treasured Points behind us gasping for air on the side of the road. And you what? That's fine. Really. It happens. To all of us. 

The thing to keep in mind when that happens is this: as long as the overall, long-term trend is toward loss and/or maintenance then no harm, no foul as long as it doesn’t become the rule rather than the exception. 

Rather then beat ourselves up when faced with the inevitable, we should instead recognize it for what it is: an annoying blip on the radar, a speed bump on the long road toward good health and a healthy lifestyle. A year from now when you're at or approaching your goal is the occasional up week encountered along the way going to make your victory any less sweet? Hell no!

As for me, I intend to enjoy my Thanksgiving fully, as well as the upcoming holidays. Ditto dinner parties, celebrations and Just For The Hell of It occasions. Doing so is part of how I live my life and you can bet your ass that I'll savor what’s on my plate and in my glass to the fullest. 

However, I will also be certain to track every last bit of it. Accountability is key, we can’t have it both ways. If I decide to blow an entire week’s Points in one day or tear through them all in a single meal then so be it but I’ll see the numbers staring back at me every time I open my WW app. Fair is fair. And when the last of the leftovers are gone I’ll kick back into weight loss mode and continue on with renewed resolve and some very happy taste buds.

Sure, I might be a pound or three heavier when I weigh in next week but BFD. I know I’m on the right track so no sense panicking or dwelling on it. The fact that I can at long last fit into some of the clothes on the left side of my closet proves it.

You know, it’s funny. My focus upon joining WW was on what I couldn't have (or what I couldn't have as often as I'd like). It didn't take long, though, for my focus to shift to what I could have.

Foods I long ago relegated to the Only If I Have To list have taken on a new charm. I'm learning that they can be pretty damned good after all and that I can use them in fun, new ways, ways that are delicious and won't result in a doubling of my life insurance premiums each year.

As for my long-time but not so good for me favorites, now that I'm not eating them every day I no longer take them for granted. Where their consumption had once been viewed as pleasant yet commonplace, their enjoyment is now thorough and sublime.

Perhaps best and most reassuring of all, although I’ve been telling myself all week long that today I won’t worry about what I eat, it’s a certainty that at least once before day’s end I’ll find myself making a smarter, healthier choice thanks to that which I’ve learned from WW.

And for that I’m thankful.

*God's apology for gefilte fish (the only food ever created that equally offends all five senses)